So, what's the difference between choosing love and people pleasing? There's one answer. Boundaries. When a person chooses to act out of love, it is happening out of a place of consciousness. Sometimes love means saying yes. Sometimes it means saying no. And, sometimes love equals letting go. Doing all of these things requires an ability to establish and honor your personal boundaries.
People pleasing, on the other hand, is always saying yes without consciousness. I'm not referring to extreme situations like saying no to drugs or alcohol. For many, that type of boundary was long established by personal preferences and parental guidance. The people pleasing I'm referring to is sacrificing yourself, disrespecting and dishonoring yourself and putting others before your own personal good and truth to yourself. It is always making excuses for another's abusive behavior or disrespect. It ignores a person who may be using you.
Choosing love means that you need to be honest with yourself, lead from a place of love and respect for yourself. All of the above take heart, self-love and practice. I'm not perfect at any of these things, but every day I try to take life's circumstances and weigh them against my place of spirit in order to make decisions. Choosing love can mean caring for your significant other when he or she is sick even if you don't feel like it or must cancel plans. It can mean choosing to be patient while another person in your life grows or expands. It can also mean loving a child enough to let that child hate you because of guidance and discipline.
I know that I deserve love and good in life and so does everyone, even the people who have hurt me. Love is our divine right including loving yourself. I hope you can choose honest love from your spirit and soul today because you can!