What do you need to feel secure? The range of desires for personal security varies greatly from personal safety to knowing where the next paycheck is coming from. It also varies between men and women. I think men feel satisfied with physiological security while women also need more emotional security to feel safe and happy.
The first thing I think about when considering personal security, my mind immediately goes to
The hierarchy tells our basic needs from the most important, basic needs to emotional needs.
We have needs in this order:
- Physiological needs like food and water.
- Safety needs like security
- Belonging needs to be part of a family or community
- Esteem needs to feel important
- Self-actualization needs to feel like you’re accomplishing goals
Then, I reflect back on my different stages of life. As a child I needed food, shelter and a loving family to feel secure. I’m fortunate enough to have had that. As a college student, I needed room and board and a fun college experience to feel secure. We are pretty agile as young adults. Then, as a young professional out of school, I needed food, shelter and an income to provide those things for myself. I didn’t always feel secure as a twenty-something because my work experience was scarce, and I struggled to have an income that I needed to make ends meet without stress. I struggled through those days of insecurity. I decided I would need more education to feel more secure about my future, so I went for a Masters in Business Administration. After I boosted my education and work experience, I eventually boosted my income.
Throughout most of this time, I struggled alone, and then one fine day, my brother came to town. I was no longer alone. Once we grew accustomed to being roommates, I realized how nice it was to have the love and emotional support of a family member around. I felt more secure by not being alone taking care of everything by myself. I discovered how much companionship meant to my personal security.
I’ve not always had my health, so feeling healthy makes me feel secure. When you don’t have your health, you appreciate having it, so I’ve always pursued and prioritized living a healthy lifestyle. That includes lots of recreation. I enjoy exercising through yoga, cycling, Pilates, swimming and much more. All in all, I learned that beyond food and shelter; love, companionship, health, income, and recreation provide me with the surroundings I need to be confident and have physical and emotional security. I learned that I feel even more secure when I have the means to provide those things for myself. It’s lovely to have someone provide for you, but when I think about how to get confidence and feel secure, I love knowing I can take care of myself. It’s a fine feeling that helps increase my emotional security. What do you need for personal security?